Pastor Shares ‘The Day My Kid Took My Vibrator to Preschool’ Story

Staff Writer

Kelly Edmiston is the Lead Pastor at the Vineyard Church in Stafford, Texas. She also has a Substack, where she recently raised some eyebrows after publishing an article The Day My Kid Took My Vibrator to Preschool, where she writes:

I have hesitated to write this post for one simple reason. Not because I am embarrassed. Not because I am nervous to talk about sex toys. Not because I have shame lurking around my bedroom.

I have hesitated to write this post for one simple reason. I am a pastor. And I am picturing my congregants’ faces reading this, as they lovingly roll their eyes at me always oversharing. I can see them laughing. “Geez, Pastor Kelly. TMI!” Too much information? Maybe. Necessary to talk about? In my humble and pastoral opinion, Absolutely.

Edmiston explains that ‘Sexual dissatisfaction is an epidemic plaguing Christian marriages” and that “People who experience sexual dissatisfaction … never learned to listen to their bodies, so they never learned what they like sexually.” These people have “shame around the experience of sexual pleasure so they cannot allow themselves to truly experience it.” One of the reasons is because:

They have lying beliefs, oftentimes from purity culture, permeating their imagination about what it means to be a “good wife” or a “good husband” and so they do not communicate what they want or need. “I can’t make him feel like less than a man” kind of garbage.

She recounts how, after having three kids, “all my hormones went crazy out of whack” and that “sex began to feel like a chore.” She notes, “In my early marriage, I came blazing out of purity culture, so I was not about to go back to that nonsense,” which prompted her to talk to her husband and buy a vibrator, which she says solved her issues. Then, one day:

One day, many years ago, I couldn’t find the vibrator that I usually keep tucked away inside my bedside table. I didn’t think much of it until I was going through my kid’s backpack getting his water bottle out to refill it and I found it. I was mortified! I figured he thought it was a toy and took it for show and tell! I am sure that the preschool teacher is still talking about the time that kid brought the vibrator to school. We still laugh about this story to this day.

While choosing to employ sex toys is a matter of freedom and conscience that married couples may choose to employ, this is not something that should be shared with the congregation at large and the rest of world.